A Generous deed

Life has brought, books of past memories. Today as I flip through one chapter, it

 brings me back again to my days in Kenya.

It was in March 1982,when my husband decided to move  from India to Kenya,  to take up a teaching post.He was appointed as the Headmaster of Don Bosco Higher Secondary school, Nairobi,Kenya. I joined him later, in May 1982. My husband had to serve as Headmaster, both for the morning and afternoon shift and would come home for an early lunch and then return only very late in the evening. So I decided it was best to look after his needs and then get used to the place, before I apply for a job.

The 3rd of August 1983, was a shocking day for us. My husband came from school early, with disheveled hair and a distraught look,he removed his tie as he entered,as I stood perplexed wondering what had gone amiss.He then told me that he  had got a call from home, while at office, a news that broke his heart- his father had passed away.We had no land phone in the house as we had just moved in. For a moment, I look bewildered and sad and recalled my father in law's last words as he bid me goodbye."This is the last time I will see you,take care." At that time, I didn't take it  too seriously and brushed it aside,as the usual talk of the aged. My heart sank in sorrow, at the thought, that I would see him no more,as he was very close to me.

It was evident, that my husband, would have to go, inorder, to pay his last respects. His boss, kindly made all arrangements, for his flight to and fro.Since, I had just come and I didn't have a job,I had no other choice but to stay behind all by myself.I felt so lost,having to be alone and not being able to attend the last rites of my father in law.My husband's peon,Henry,whose wife,Alice was our part time maid,suggested that his niece,Pamela Auma who was doing her ' O 'level, Form 2, could come and keep me company after school and during the night.That was a perfect arrangement for me, as she was fluent in English and I was only getting myself familiarised with Kiswahili. 

 I was torn between two worlds---the thought of not having my husband, by my side, and  having to get used to an utter stranger.Pamela arrived the evening, before my husband left for the airport.

Pamela like all Kenyan girls was a well built young girl,dark with the usual short boy cut, kinky hair.  She belonged to the Luo tribe of Kisumu.She was  very quiet, soft spoken and always with a smile on her face. We took to each other rather easily. Although, I had very friendly neighbours,it was a consolation to have someone present there at night. She helped me,cook at night for myself and she cooked her own meal of Ugali and maize.In the mornings, she would leave for school and return in the evenings.While we got talking she told me, how she came from a large family of six  children and was the eldest.Her father died and her mother remarried, they were struggling to make ends meet.

 My husband arrived from his trip,after a week,and then Pamela left.  We got down to our usual routine and Pamela was soon forgotten but the thought of her mother struggling, to bring them up, remained at the back of my mind.

I will never forget the New Year of 1984. After the morning service in church, we returned home, to find an envelope lying at our door step.It was a promotion, as well as,a transfer letter for my husband,as Headmaster to Lake Nakuru Secondary School, Nakuru.This was one of the most prestigious schools in that district for'O'Level as well as ' A' Level courses.And to crown it all, even I was offered a teaching post at that school.I felt this was the greatest gift, God had given us.Since school would reopen, after the Christmas vacation,for the next academic year,we had to shift to our new location immediately. The thought of moving  to a new place and new surroundings,felt intriguing but leaving behind memories and  the friends, I had made over the years left pangs of sadness.                                   

Suddenly, the thought of Pamela came to my mind.She was doing her 'O' Levels,Form 2 and was to join Form 3. I had told my husband about the hardships that Pamela's family was facing. So it struck us, why don't we sponsor her education. We had no children then,though married for seven long years. Since both of us were working, we could easily manage to help her family tide over some difficulty. So we sounded our idea to Henry, who immediately conveyed it to her mother. Pamela came over with her mother to see us, before we left.We told them that we would arrange for her transfer to Form 3, in Lake Nakuru School.

That is how Pamela came to stay.

        Photo : Pamela and I 

My husband reported for duty as the Head of the school and I joined duty to teach the 'O'Levels.

      Photo: Lake Nakuru Secondary School

     Photo: Staff of Lake Nakuru Secondary   School

We shifted over to Nakuru.We got a pretty little house, in a big compound,with a garden in front and a Jacaranda tree in the back yard.During November, the ground would be strewn,like a carpet with light purple flowers. There was an outhouse at the back which was perfect for Pamela to settle in,as she could have her own space without any disturbance.

     Photo : Front of our house in Nakuru

    Photo: Family friends and our dog,Hobo

    Photo The Side of the house

It was indeed a lucky house too,because even to this day, it brings back many  fond memories.

Pamela soon joined Form 3, 'O' Level at Lake Nakuru Secondary school.We used to go together to school,come over for lunch, as the house was just walking distance from the school.When we returned in the evening, she would help me. A real bond grew between us and I felt a motherly love towards her.

I made a dress for her from one of my sarees(as seen in the photo above). We bought her all the necessary books, uniform etc and asked her to concentrate on her studies inorder to attain a  bright future. As my husband and I believed in Malcolm X's saying,"Education is the passport to the future,for tomorrow belongs to those who prepare for it today." We appointed a maid to do the house work,as we didn't want Pamela's studies to be disrupted.

That little house, Pamela's arrival, as well as, that lucky year of 1984, altogether brought us bumper luck. We became the proud parents of a little  baby boy,Mithun Jude Kesavan.God had answered our prayers. He was our bundle of joy.

This is the only picture I have of him as he took away his baby album from me.

The chair back and sofa rests seen, were crocheted by Pamela for the whole sofa set,during her spare time. 

Pamela belonged to a large family consisting of Charles,Margaret,Judith,Beldine and the last born Helen.

      In photo: Helen who  visited us at our      house

Looked upon as part of our family, Pamela,grew up as my daughter. She was not like the other kids in school, who had boyfriends and dropped out of school due to pregnancy.She had her head on her shoulder and often reminded me of our Indian girls.Two years sped by so fast.She finished her 'O' Level. She had actually qualified to do her 'A' Levels and we were only too willing to sponsor her education further. But luck was against her. Her mother was illiterate and not aware, of the value of education, she came to take her  back to their home town Londhiani,as her mother wanted to get her married. Among the Luos or for that matter any African tribe, the girls marry at a very young age and produce many children.Pamela being soft spoken and an obedient girl, could not object,although she wanted to stay and continue her education.We even offered to let her complete,a Secretarial course,so that she could find employment.Her mother was so adamant that she refused and practically took her away from us forcefully.We were so heart broken, at her mother's behaviour and felt that she was so ungrateful.It was in the year 1986, that I last saw or heard of Pamela. 

In those days, as means of communication was only by the telephone and expensive, hardly anyone kept in contact. Moreover,the Kenyan Post Office followed the Post Box system,so only if you had a Post Box number could you  communicate. So even if, Pamela ever wanted to keep in touch, she couldn't. Since, Henry was in Nairobi and we were in Nakuru we couldn't gather any further information about her from him.

After Pamela left,we stayed on for a couple of years in Nakuru, and God blessed us with two more children. A boy Ashwin Charles Nair and a girl Priyanka Elizabeth Nair.  So we now had three beautiful children.

We never discussed about Pamela,mainly,due to  the hurt.As life moves on, you get busy and people who come into your life, go into oblivion.

My husband was later transferred to Kisumu,where he worked in a school and I got the post of Headmistress,in a new up coming school, Pinocchio Primary School.I was the pioneer in starting that school,which in 1995 had the best results  for the KCPE ,( Kenya Certificate of Primary Education),examination and hence became the best school in the Municipality of Kisumu.  My husband later moved from his teaching career to become the Manager, of a bread manufacturing company called, 'May Fair'.

We were living a very good life with the children being educated at Pinocchio school.Unfortunately, things took a turn for the worse.All of a sudden, my husband fell ill and was admitted to one of the leading hospitals. They suspected his stomach distension to be a growth,whereas it was an ulcer that had burst.Their diagnosis went wrong and they operated on him. He died instantly on the operation table.They tried to rewrite the report, so as to cover their mistake.Going for  legal battle would be, like an ant fighting an elephant( This hospital, being such a prestigious institution).  The greatest blow in my life, occurred on that day, 24th May 1994, left with three children aged 9,8 and 6. I was  so devastated,like a ship without a rudder.It took time for me to come to terms with it. I could not show my feelings to the kids, as it would upset them, so  vented out my feelings, when I went for my bath. At that moment, my thoughts went to Pamela,I wished, she were by my side and wondered if she was aware of my husband's death.

My boss was very good to me and wanted me to continue.He provided me with all the facilities, house rent, free tuition fees for the kids, and to use the school bus as a means of transport when ever required. My neighbours called it my "Limousine"!

 My boss, gave me enough time to decide, by extending my work permit for three years. I was in a real dilemma,whether to return to India or continue.I weighed the pros and cons,and decided to return to India,as I had taken leave from my job in India and I could rejoin. Mine was a wise decision, as University education for the children would be beyond my capability and a few years later,  I came to know that my boss passed away.

I returned to Trivandrum,India,my home town and rejoined duty, in the University of Kerala.I went through things so traumatic,that my mind wasn't built to handle but I fought and persevered every day.God gave me the strength to carry on. True to my conviction that education is the passport to the world, I made sure that all my children were well educated.My eldest son completed his MBA and  became a Manager in the Corporate world.My

second son,  took up the  Chartered Accountancy course.My daughter completed her BTech and did PG Journalism to get into the field of technical writing.I was able to guide them in the right path in their careers. Both my eldest son and daughter are married.

You think that, "Alls well that ends well".Things don't turn out the way we want.Children grow up forgetting, the hardships they have been through.A big void occurs, as they now move on, with their own lives and they have only time for themselves.The law of nature of birds is apt in this case, they fly away from their nests.

It was in August, this year, during the Onam festival, that I  couldn't eat anything without bringing up. So  my friend Lat,asked me to spend Onam, with her,as I wasn't  feeling too well to cook 'Sadhya' for myself and my second son.

.  Photo Had a nice Onam with Lat and her Aunt

I had a nice time and enjoyed the Sadhya, but by night, I had a severe stomach pain, which was unbearable and l regurgitated.Being Onam, all doctors were on leave.Next day, my younger son took me to meet a gastroenterologist,and I was diagnosed with kidney stones, so he referred me to a Urologist. The scan showed that I had 4 kidney stones and was given medication.The medication made me  feel  so weak and I felt dejected. I couldn't do my usual chores,I just cooked rice and thanks to Uber eats, ordered food from outside.I was given a strict diet with  plenty of intake of fluids. My son was busy with his  final CA exams.

 It was in November, I  was feeling so lonely and depressed, with nothing else to do, but flip as usual through Facebook.Suddenly, I came across a friend request.It was an African girl.I thought to myself,someone is trying to fool me,maybe some Nigerian.Then I checked my messenger.

"Hi Mum,this is your daughter Pamela Auma,whom you sponsored at Lake."

Just as Robert Brault says,"When you have brought up kids, there are memories you store directly in your tear ducts."

Just then those very tears kept rolling down my cheeks,they were tears mixed with joy,sadness and excitement. God brought her to me, at the right time. Just imagine, 32 years later, she came bouncing back into my life at an opportune moment.

I wanted to share this excitement with someone,the best person would have been my husband.My eldest son, was too small to remember her. Still I told him, as well as, the other two with excitement but ofcourse,as expected, it didn't have the same effect. 

Pamela messaged me that by the time,she got the news of my husband's death,it was too late,I had already left Kenya.She said she bought a new smart phone and so searched for my name and found me on Facebook and sent the request.How nice of her and thanks to Facebook. I then added her number on my whatsapp, so that I could hear her voice and update myself from where we left.

It was with regrets that I learnt the news about the death of  her mother in 2002 and then about Henry.She informed me that Alice,my maid, was now at home with her grown up children.  We  now keep in touch on whatsapp and she sends me snaps and without fail enquires about my health.

She revealed to me that she left because her step father, was threatening to kill her mother, if she didn't get her married,as he wanted her dowry. I regretted then that we had  misunderstood her mother's intention.It appeared that the suitor was a drunkard, and so she ran away and came to stay with her aunt in the suburbs of Nakuru, hoping to get a job.

Among the Africans, it is the man who pays the dowry.That's why many of the African sales women, used to ask me,if my husband paid a huge dowry to get a girl like me.They thought I was a very young girl(due to my stature)who married a much older man.

Unfortunately, Pamela was unable to find a job.Later, when she attended her uncles son's funeral at Kisumu,her aunt from Homa bay invited her over,  promising to get her a job. There she met Joseph Obeidi Ola and got married. She worked as a Untrained Primary teacher for a year and a half.

Being, well aware of Bejamin Franklin's words,"An investment in knowledge pays the best interest." Therefore,she applied for training  in 1990 for the two year Teacher Training Course in Kiambu.She taught as Primary grade 1 teacher in 2002. Then she pursued  a diploma in special education and graduated in 2005.She was promoted to Senior teacher in 2009.She joined Kampala International,Uganda so as to graduate but had to drop out,due to lack of fees.  At present, she has a government teaching post at Homa Bay,which is pensionable. She uses the boat to go to work.

 She has five children,three girls and two boys.Queen Atieno,Winnie Achieng,Claire Adhiambo,Arnold Olo,Gerald Ochieng

        With her family and Helen

            With her husband

       Her husband,herself and elder son

  She was able to educate all her children. Her elder son is doing B.Tech, 4th year in Electronics and Communication.and the youngest son is in Form 3.

Pamela is also an annual Examiner for Kiswahili Insha, at Starehe Boys  Center.She has been an Examiner since 1995.

            At Starehe Boys Center

She has been kind enough, to continue that generosity shown to her, by educating her sister's children uptoUniversity.Despite all her expenses and hardships, she has been able to build herself a new house without breaking down the old house.

               .       Her old house

                 Her new house

Each time,she calls she is always grateful to me for the education that we gave her.She says that has helped her to educate the rest of her family.I always reinforce  by stating that it is her gratitude that has brought her to this position.

On 18th February, she called to say that she completed her new home  and  would like me to visit.On 20th February,I dreamt that I had visited her.I hope God grants me this wish,to see her in person with her happy family someday.

Recently, I had no news of her and was wondering why she was not checking my whatsapp messages.Then, right enough, I get an international call from her to find out, how I am doing.She said her smartphone fell down and was not working and she has to wait till the lock down is lifted to get a new one.She had actually made an international call to enquire about my well being, during the lockdown.How sweet of her!

Pamela has imbibed certain Indian qualities,her desire to pursue her education further,her sense of fashion like me, (everything, matching as seen in the photos).It is due to her generous and kind nature that God has helped  to give her a happy family and a new home.

Crazy College Teens Days Part II

As I flip through the pages of my album,I come across so many photos taken during my Degree days and then decide to blog the crazy teen Degree days. The thought of returning to college for my Degree course,made me adamant to challenge those gang of boys who called me,"Shisu".(Ref:Crazy CollegeTeen Days Part 1) I was now ready to surprise them,with my matching saree and blouse,pottu,earrings and colourful tinkling glass bangles,and though by now I had  gained a few inches, I decided to wear heels and fool them.  My hair had grown really long, far below my knees. I had transformed myself into a bold young lady who was not afraid of their eve teasing.I was never the shy,coy or giggling kind.Novels like "Mills and Boons,"  and "Babara Cartland",that were a craze among my peers, didn't romantically intrigue me, as it was just fiction.I enjoyed matter of fact books." One of my favourites was,"Good Earth,"and I loved all the series of P.G Woodhouse,which would send me into peals of laughter.I enjoyed reading magazines like "Illustrated weekly",which was also my grandfather's favourite.I prefered articles and short stories.

Life was meant for good friends and great adventures, and here were we, five friends from Pre Degree who joined the Degree course,as the "Famous Five. " We were all in it together,we didn't mind associating with others and many others would join us in our escapades. Padu, having come from Calcutta, was fashionable with short hair and wore stylish outfits. She stayed in the hostel, and took Arabic as her Second Language.She was well versed in Hindi, so could guide us in the dialogues of the Hindi movies. Sue was just a stone's throw away from the college, dreamy eyed, but a keen observer and good at immitating anyone. She was also a voracious reader and also a source for me to borrow books from. Lat, was the chatter box, in the gang.She  had her mother as the head of Physical Department of our college,so we were often afraid to involve her in our feats, but on several occasions she turned out to be the master mind.Although, she was from the English Literature group we came together for French and Second Language English classes .Chuttu was the quiet one, more with us physically than mentally. She was actually the silent partner in our kind of crazy, daring adventures.Then there was me,Prem(my pet name at home)- the bold one.Actually, I was the one who formed the gang, since each one of them was my friend. We were alike in every respect,not crazy romancers and none of us had any boyfriends. As that was taboo among our orthodox families in our generation.We were more the fun loving type,with no cares or worries.Although we fooled around,so much, when it came to studies we excelled. We were the thickest of friends,that I don't remember a day when we fought with each other. Like in the cookie of life,we friends were the chocolate chips.

Photo: The"Famous Five"for Kerala Puravi 1stNovember.

During those  crazy teen years, our heroes were movie stars and we fell in love with them and dreamed about them.To mention a few heroes of our time, were Rajesh Khanna,Amitabh Bachan,Dev Anand and Sashi Kapoor. If any of our friends had a different hero, then there would be verbal wars fought over them. We had a good collection of their pictures,taken from 'Film Fare'and such magazines and even exchanged doubles.

Our favourite heroines were Sharmilla Tagore,Rakhee, Asha Parek, Sadhana,Shabana Azmi and Hema Malini,and we would imitate their hairstyles and follow their dressing sense, especially their style of sarees and blouses.

This pic was taken on our college day when we  were all dressed up in style.

This was taken on November 1st.

Our famous meeting place,  during lunch recess was under the low lying trees  in the campus,with exposed tree roots ,with its branches intertwined and convenient for us to sit or even lie down on (as seen in the pic below)We could see the road near Xanadu clearly, from that point, since it was on a little hill,raised from the road .We jokingly had, nick names, for all the guys who passed by, to go to Government Arts College.

  In class, the back bench was reserved for us. It was there, that we made our plans for the day, as we all came together for the English lessons.  I recall some of the teachers of our Degree classes.The Poetry lesson,taken by Rathi teacher,she was called ," deer eyes", because she had such beautiful eyes. She transported us to the world of the romantic poets....Keat, Shelley, Wordsworth and Donne,giving us a glimpse of their lives too.We sat spell bound, listening to the poems and never absented ourselves from her class.Then, there was Matilda Carmen,all dressed in white,taking, Prose, "Tale of two cities'. A tale whose theme involves, sacrifice and love.How Sydney Carton sacrifices his life for Lucie,inorder to make her happy with her lover.She would question,  the back benchers,knowing fully well that, no answers would come from the rest  of the class.The most boring  was our Drama class , 'Macbeth',taken after lunch break by Sreedharan Sir.The heat,the heavy lunch and his monotonous tone sent us off to lullaby land. We often cut his class either to go for a movie or to just sit in Padu's room in the hostel.Our Subsidiary subject,History was taken by Indira teacher, who rattled away her notes by heart and with her pen bent over at intervals to look into her notes,so as to obtain the flow. We just tolerated her by going into dream land.She expected us to produce  her very notes in verbatim form,so we  were hardly  able to score good marks, as we were befret of the mugging habit.Economics main  classes were handled by Chandra Prabha teacher,who taught the theory of diminishing marginal returns so well,that it sticks in my memory even today. A kind hearted soul, who would  never scold any student  but only encourage them.I always felt she was the epitome of a true teacher.

 Photo :Chandra Prabha teacher in the centre with us

Our Head of the Department, Chandrasekharan Pillai Sir took , took Public Finance, for us.He would come in a black Ambassador,get out of the car and wipe the car with a towel and with that very same towel,he would wipe his face, while we watched  from the classroom corridors. We were so sure, that his dark  complexion was due to this practice.

Photo:  Sir, a thorn between the roses !

Our parents were very strict with us and would not allow us to go for movies, especially Hindi movies.So our only solution was to cut class and go, after lunch for the 1o'clock show and return in time before the evening bell, take our books and head home. 

We saw several movies,but the one that is etched in my mind is 'Aradhana',One of our favourites, starring none other than

  our heroes, Rajesh Khanna and Sharmila Tagore. There were so many nice songs in it, especially,' 'Mere sapno ki rani kab aayegi tu', 'Khora Kagaz' and to crown it all was 'Roopa Tera Mastana'..which sent romatic thrills and caused butterflies in our stomach.My friend, Sue could immitate Rajesh Khanna's look so well, that she often immitated him and made us relive that moment,sending us into a romantic mode.

 One day, as usual, we played truant and  went for a movie , leaving our books under our famous tree and returned  only to find it missing.We went to the office room to find out if it was among the "lost and found",only to be told we had to go and meet the Head of the Physical Department.We had no other choice,trembling  with fear, approached Madam.The look she gave us from  above her spectacles really made our hearts skip a beat, but we gathered  courage and bluffed her that we had gone to the Ladies hostel to be with Padu as she was not keeping too well. She fell for our story and then beckoned us to take our books and warned us, never to be so careless with our books.Since Lat was her daughter, we could not tell the truth. Later, we f toound a safer haven for our books,in one of the classrooms.

  During our first year, the French classes got disrupted,as our teacher got married and left  and there was no substitute teacher at college.  Our exams were fast approaching, so we had to seek private tuition.Luckily, for me, there was Padmanabhan Sir,close by to my place in Statue.So both Sue, Lat,Chuttu and I joined the  morning tuition classes at 8am. I was glad because now, I would have company to go to College in the morning. We enjoyed our French tuitions  but had to learn the several  verb conjugations and the gendres,because Sir, would often question us.Sir, often called out ,"Grace can you tell me",we all kept quiet as there was no Grace in our class.Then he would turn to me and I would have to remind him umpteen times that I was not Grace.Later I had to just give up.

Our way to college  became intriguing, we would come across many  University college boys, coming from the opposite direction. There was this particular boy a bit stout and burly, having dark curly hair and a beard,big dreamy eyed  looks.His looks actually fell on me but I never dared look back at him because I was afraid of him.But these friends, when they saw him coming with his gang of friends,from afar they would move away, in such a way, that I came close to him as he brushed past me. Sue would often immitate his dreamy eyed look and make fun of me.

One day,while I was returning from college,it was raining ,when I reached a vacant plot,(where Canara bank is situated today,before the Spencer junction ), to cross over,I caught sight of  this gang of boys waiting for me.My heart started pounding, for  a moment I felt that they would hear it,my knees were trembling,my saree wet with the rain started winding round my legs and prevented me from walking fast. Then they started singing,"

"Rain, rain go away,our little Miss wants to go home."I didn't have the guts to laugh, what a cute thing to say.Was this puppy love?  He was the main  guitarist of a group and once that group was invited to to perform in our college for the Arts Festival. One of the songs he sang was Muhammed Rafi's,"The she I love is a beautiful beautiful dream come true"....as the song goes..."as black as night is her raven hair" ...so my friends came to the conclusion that he was singing that song to me.That song  even today evokes fond memories. We parted ways after college,no flame of love was kindled ,I never saw him after that and recently got to know that he had committed suicide.The reason nobody knows,sad though, it resurrected memories.

 Our tuition classes soon had to end as a new teacher was appointed for French.It  was young, fair Karunakaran, Sir.He was so shy that he could not face the girls in Women's College,as he would blush with embassment and become pink.  He became the heart throb of several girls. Somehow he was fond of me,maybe because I approached him boldly.Our French classes were during the first period. Sue as usual was lazy,so she would inevitably come late to class,either after attendance was  taken or only in the second period. We could see her from a distance, from our class room, entering the college gates,swinging her hips and twirling the umbrella,lost in her own  dream world, not in the least bothered, that she was late.It was only towards the end of our Second Year, when we applied for our Second Degree exam,that she realised she was short of attendance and wouldn't be able to write the exam.She was in a fix, but being Karunakaran Sir's favourite student,I approached him and asked him to adjust her attendance and he so willingly obliged.She was so grateful to me for saving her from her parents' wrath and being able to write the exam without losing a year.

 Once Karunakaran, Sir, was absent for over a week and we came to know that he was sick. So we decided to pay him a courtesy call, during lunch break, as he stayed near the college.When we reached his house and rang the bell, he opened the door and was shocked to see us,he was so embarrassed that he didn't utter a word.At that moment, bold as we were,we  felt as if  we were intruding on his privacy,so without a word, we  just turned back and ran. Only after reaching college,  we regained our senses and burst out laughing.Several years later, we learnt that poor Karunakaran,Sir,became mental and was admitted in a mental assylum.That was shocking and sad news for us.

The rowdy tendency, arose in us one day, while we were sitting at the College  Open Air Auditorium,Sue pointed out to us  a gang of our juniors who were spreading  rumours about her elder brother. An instinct of oneness rose in us and we decided to boo them. Another gang also joined us in booing,not exactly knowing the reason, and it  turned out to be very loud. This embarrassed those girls.That was the first time in the history of that college that anyone booed and took part in such an act  of hooliganism. We were afraid, we would be summoned to the Principal,but luckily we escaped.

We had another hideout when we didn't want to go to class and that was the Women's hostel,right behind the college.We spent so many hours chatting and joking in Padu's room.She would make hot coffee for us and we  all loved it.We mingled with the other hosteliers too.For their Hostel Day,they requested me to play the hawain guitar, the song they strangely chose, was none other than,"The she I love is a beautiful beautiful dream come true,"a super hit at that time.

 

We had this sense of mischief gleaming in our eyes and came up with the oddest things.We decided to take a photograph with the lenghts of our hair.

Padu had the shortest and me the longest. 

Photo : Lat and I for a drama. Here the length of my hair can be seen.

We even climbed the tree that was next to our French class.

During the  final year it was announced that we would be going on a one day excursion to Neyar Dam and Ponmudi.We were so excited that we decided to do away with the boring saree and get into something more comfortable.Padu chose pants and shirt,Sue chose the lungi and top,whereas Lat and myself got into tights and tops.Chuttu remained with her saree.

Several others also joined us in various outfits.

Padu reminded me that it was I who taught all of them to tie the scarf in a fashionable way.We enjoyed the trip,singing and running around the trees in  Hindi movie style enacting scenes.We all shared the snacks that were brought and had lunch at one of the hotels enroute to Ponmudi.The teachers gave us full freedom to enjoy.

Photo:Sue in one of her imitating moods

Photo:Another friend of mine, Rema seen with us

Towards the end of our Degree course, one of our classmates, Padmini, announced  to the class that the whole class would be given a free treat at her expense.Padmini's father owned the famous"Simla Ice Cream,"on MG Road opposite the General Post Office,the only one of its kind in Trivandrum at that time..Boy! Weren't we excited.We went in our best attire and just couldn't choose from the menu.There were all sorts of cup ice creams  and cone ice creams of various flavours. The famous North Indian Rasagoolas, and Rasmalai was also on the menu.It was a real feast for our eyes.We wanted to taste everything,really went beserk.Young as we were, we tried out nearly everything we could lay our hands on and in the end when we reached home felt so sick, that we had to skip our dinner.

Well,as everything must come to an end,our Degree days were over, each one of us went our own separate ways. Some kept in touch,especially the Famous Five,whereas the others just disappeared into oblivion. We did lose touch with each other for a short while as we got busy with our own lives but thanks to technology we have renewed our friendship and keep in touch.Padu,Lat and Chuttu attended my son's wedding reception,it was a reunion after so many years,Sue was unable to attend. These were the best days of our life and the bond of friendship created lasts a life time.

" The great things about getting older is that you don't lose all the other ages, you've been." Madeleine Engel.

Crazy College Teen Days Part I

Reminiscing those yester years which have gone by so fast,I recall the thoughts that stand so vivid in my memory.

   An innocent girl, straight out of school to a fairly new world of Pre Degree college life .I felt like a bird set free from a cage. Coming from a school where you were under the surveillance of the strict eyes of the Holy Angels' School nuns,with severe punishment if caught,into one where freedom reigned supreme and nobody was bothered whether you attended class or not. Here you had to have your head on your shoulders to make the right decisions, so as not to go astray.

We had the freedom to wear whatever clothes we liked, of any hue and colour.Trivandrum being a small town at that time, the traditional dress reigned supreme in college.It was either half skirt and blouse(pavada and blouse),or half saree or saree.The hair not plaited  neatly like in school but left loose quite oily and decked with jasmine flowers.Nobody ever wore the salwar kameez as it was alien to Trivandrum at that time. Being of a small demeanor and having come from abroad,I chose to wear half skirt and blouse.

 Many of my school mates preferred to join All Saints College as  they felt there would be more discipline and it was a new building with modern facilities.As a child  I never wanted my father to unnecessarily spend money on my education. I was well aware that we were living on his pension and being the youngest of six college going siblings.

My walk from my home in Statue to Holy Angel's Convent, had now to be from Statue to Women's College,Vazhuthacaud. This did not deter me,as I preferred to go walking than by bus,as it was safer in those days! In the buses, you had to beware of all kinds of old baldies, as you could be touched or pinched by these wicked old men.

 At School we could come home for lunch but at college, food was sent through women like a dabba kind of system.In those days several women took up the job of carrying our lunch boxes of steel, in a big basket on their heads.We enjoyed our hot lunches ,at the lunch sheds and shared our food and even mingled with our seniors. Thank God there was no ragging at that time.

Being a government college,most of the students came from the local schools.There were very few of us from the convent school.I found myself among girls who spoke fluent Malayalam and coming from a school where we were not allowed to speak Malayalam,I faced a great challenge. Still I tried to mingle among them ,fearing they would brand me as a show off, pretending not to know the language.They often talked Malayalam with a double meaning and innocent as I was, I took it in the literal sense not really understanding the meaning of their jokes.

It took a few months for me to settle in this whole new atmosphere and soon I had a gang of assorted friends. The teachers were all excellent and very cooperative and even though, we were always the back benchers, they knew we paid attention and answered the questions put to us,so we were in their good books.Being straight from school we were very attentive.

My journey to the college was past University College,which I dreaded every morning, as there used to be a whole gang of boys waiting near their classroom windows which overlooked the road. They would either whistle or pass comments. My heart would pound,my legs would not gain the speed to walk fast, as I was not so used to such gang of boys.

Soon they spotted me and shouted out, "Shishu(small child)!  Which nursery are you going to?" I was so taken aback and felt so ashamed of my petite self that I swore, to teach these fellows a lesson,  I would wear saree for the Degree course.

This is how I looked in my short skirt and blouse that brought the comments on me. 

 

                          

 Another fond memory was my  first excursion to Cape Comorin, the name given during the British rule but today known as Kanyakumari. Being the southern most town in the Indian peneculiar,it is also known as,,"the Land's end." It is the meeting point of three oceans- Bay of Bengal,the Arabian Sea and Indian Ocean.. I was all excited because I had never gone with my friends only with family. 

We started our journey, early in the morning by a bus hired for the purpose.  

 Enroute to Cape we stopped at the Sucheendram temple..Everything was so thrilling because I got to visit a temple for the first time.

Then visited Padmanabhapuram Palace,once the capital of the princely State of Travancore and having the finest of traditional architecture.  At Cape we visited the Gandhi Memorial,where the ashes of Gandhi were kept, before being scattered into the sea in 1948. The uniqueness of this place is that on October 2nd, Gandhiji's birthday,the sun's rays fall through a hole on to the exact place where the urn was kept.  We had a time of our life wetting our feet as the waves moved in, onto the beach and several of us got fully wet. We bought different types of shells and multicoloured sand which is a unique feature of the beach.Sadly not anymore.

Returned home before it was too late because we didn't wait for the setting of the sun, being another unique feature of the place.    

My hair at that time for 1st Pre Degree, was waist length. I had long straight black hair and it really grew fast. By the time I reached Second year it grew much below my waist. My friends really admired my hair and asked me,what was the secret to my long hair.I told them coconut oil and bathing with soap in warm water,which was the truth They couldn't believe it and they said I was trying to make them lose all their hair.

Another challenge that made me opt for saree,during my Degree course was the thought that my hair would by then reach below my half skirt and dreaded the thought of what comment those gang of boys would come out with.After the Pre degree exams, I was looking forward to my Degree college days.  I changed my wardrobe to sarees,getting the matching blouse stitched and matching coloured under skirt. Many of my relatives who came from abroad gifted me sarees.